PostSecret & Me
I get a book for Christmas every year. This year, I asked for the second installation (My Secret) of one of my favorite books ever purchased … a book called PostSecret. For those of you who haven’t heard of it, it is a collection of postcards sent in to this guy (Frank Warren), who initially sent out something around 1000 postcards as an art project, asking people to write a secret on it, decorate it, do whatever to it, and send it back to him, anonymously. Well, the response was so overwhelming that he started a blog and published a book (two, now), each spotlighting selected postcards. I’m not sure, but something about so many people (real people!) sending in these truly genuine, sincere secrets really, really touches and inspires me.
Time said of the first … A fascinating public airing of private thougts - some dark, others funny, endearing or disturbing - written on homemade postcards … The range of efforts (meticulous, sloppy, artful, ponderous) will astound you.
I’m talking about it today because I always get a little reminiscent immediately before and for a little while after the start of a new year. I don’t know why. I guess it’s the general thought of, Wow, another year gone by … what did I do with it?
I always make a list of Resolutions … some I write not to keep, some I write hoping with all hope that I do keep, and some I write knowing without a shadow of a doubt that I will keep. Mine aren’t lofty … I gave those up a long time ago. You know … Win the lottery. … Shrink 5 inches to look like all the other girls. … Fit into a size 0 by February 1st. … the Blah blah blah resolutions, as I call them. Thankfully, I’ve wised up a bit and don’t make those foolish ones anymore. Mine are now more about things that I can control … that are feasible. Some are small and very silly … some are funny … some are sad … some are serious … I used to limit myself to 10, but I stopped that when I realized I can’t put a lid on that kind of thing. This year, I’ve decided I’m just going to write them all down, organize them, laminate them, and frame them right by my mirror in my room. Might as well, right? Right!
Back to PostSecret. (Sorry, I know I’m jumping around.) My favorite one in the new book is probably one that simply says, My heart is an idiot. It makes me laugh (belly laugh, at that) … because I relate so, so well to that statement. I’d just never heard it put quite like that: My … heart … is … an … idiot! Resolution: Make it smarter!
Gosh, I’m giggling now just thinking about all of the muck my heart has dragged me through.
My, my, my …
The cool thing is that hearts heal … and can be educated, in the good way! This, I have certainly learned in ‘06. The heart is an intrepid piece o’ work! Takes a lickin’ and keeps on tickin’, if you know what I’m sayin’.
Case & Point:
I was hurt a while back by someone who was very important to me, and I don’t think I ever really recovered from it. When I finally thought I had, and tried again … I fell in love (or something like it) again … and I was hurt … again. I would say that I was hurt worse the second time … because I felt like I should have known better, not given in so easily, not opened up, not believed so deeply … not after the first time. Both followed a pattern, and the only link between the two was me. Of course, I became really good at blaming myself for a long time … for the first especially, and then for a while after the second for that one as well. I then realized something … I’m better than blame, damnit! The only pattern that I really found is that I not only once, but twice, chose and fell in love (or something like it) with lying, philandering, selfish men who never had any intention of giving back what I gave. So, heck, what do you do? Well, you break the pattern … and you stop putting up with the ones who aren’t going to be good for you, right? Right! Damn, it seems so easy now. You can’t change people, and you can’t make someone treat you right, no matter how much you beg and plead. You can’t make someone love you, either … just like you can’t make yourself love someone. (Broken record, party of one!)
I haven’t thought about all of this in a long time … and, by a long time, I mean the better part of a year. That’s a big step for me. Recent events and a little bit of 2006 in review (which will probably be a whole new entry after the 1st of the year) has made me look at these things, albeit briefly, once again … I (finally and officially) lost not one, but two things this past year that I never thought I’d lose.
The part I never expected is that I’m better than ever because of it. It’s all in the past now, and I couldn’t be more excited, happy, joyous, stoked, thrilled, elated, giddy, pumped, jubilant, and celebratory about it.
L-I-V-I-N, baby!
There is a quote that one of my old friends shared a while back that was very poignant to me: We’re gonna rise from these ashes like a bird aflame … It’s from a David Gray song, called Shine. If there was one sentence I could choose for My 2006, that would be it. Rise above, I do feel I have.
Sorry … back to the PostSecret stuff. (This all ties in somehow, I promise.)
When I first found the book, I thought about sending one in, but then I realized that I had so many to choose from … I didn’t even know where to begin. So, what did I do? Well, I started a scrapbook, and put all of my PostSecrets in it. It’s almost full now. I guess that could’ve be my official PostSecret at the time … I have too many secrets to choose from.
The beauty … (in the breakdown) … it’s over. My life is different now, I’m different now. And, you know, it sounds cheesy … but I’m pretty much made of cheese, so it’s going to be okay … but discovering PostSecret kind of made me start looking at those things (as well as many others), writing them down, dealing with them, and filing them away … literally. I’m so much healthier now because of that. I guess you could say, in an off-base way, the book kind of made me a better person. I can’t give it too much credit, however … I’ll reserve that for mainly myself. (Ha!) It did start a certain process within myself, though. It would’ve happened eventually, but I’ll just happy I stumbled upon a catalyst sooner rather than later.
Wouldn’t it be great if we could all do that? Be honest, be real, tell it, deal with it, and put it away.
I think so.
If you are interested in buying either book, here are some links:
The Secret Lives of Men & Women (… one I didn’t know about until after I posted this …)
And, of course, the website: WWW.POSTSECRET.BLOGSPOT.COM.
Okay, now I’m off to go ring in this New Year of 2007 better everbefore … HAPPILY!! Oh yes … happily. Everyone out there be safe, have fun, and rock ‘07 out!!
P.S. This is the coolest cake I’ve ever seen!
‘07 is going to rule!
